Brahms’s Museum 2000

This happened in Hamburg 10 years ago.

I was planning to visit Brahms' museum in Hamburg but had mistaken a particular address as it, only to realise my mistake when I arrived. I then went around asking for the correct location, but no one seemed to know... Finally, a receptionist from a concert hall tended to my queries and pointed to me (on the map) the correct location of the museum.

Pleasantly surprised, it was only a 20-minutes walk from where I then was. However, when I'd arrived at the museum, (it's a very small museum, approximately the size of 2 Singapore shop houses) I buzzed the doorbell for a couple of minutes but there was no answer. I buzzed it again but still, there was no reply. That was when I noticed a little German note sticking at the door - the museum only opens on Tuesday and Thursday, from 10am to 1pm. I glanced at my watch immediately, which read Thursday, 1:25pm.

I had already made plans to move on to Hannover the very next day, and 2 days later to Vienna. Then I would get back to London and head back to Singapore 3 days after. Hence, I wasn’t prepared to make any alterations to my plans and bookings and stayed over the weekend to make it for the museum the following Tuesday.

Which means, I have to give Johannes Brahms Museum a miss!!!

I couldnt believe what had happened! There was no way I could accept it and I was honestly, absolutely unprepared for it!

How could my long awaited Johannes Brahms museum brushed past my shoulder just like that? I went around the nearby shops asking if there were other possible ways of entering the museum; I phoned the museum, buzzed the doorbell, but no, nothing changed.

I cried outside the museum, for a good whole 45 minutes!

I cried like a kid unable to grab her toy; I refused to leave; I couldn't bear to leave; and I was reluctant to leave!

After the long cry, though I wasn’t totally convinced, I had finally decided to come to term with reality. Anyway, there was absolutely nothing I could do on my side. My closest encounter with Brahms was at the entrance of the museum, a sculpture i could vaguely see through from the thick-glass door.

It was so near, yet seemed so far!!! :'(

My mood was dampened the whole day, and I was extremely extremely sad. However, at the back of my mind, I believed there must be a reason behind this entire encounter, about why I should miss this museum. I firmly believed.

There wasn’t any concrete reasoning at that point to support the way I felt, but I knew for sure there must be a reason which wasn’t explicitly made known to me at that particular moment - I might get to know it the very next minute or perhaps many years later, or even never at all. In whichever case, I believed there must be a reason.

Later that evening, I was scribbling on my diary when a thought suddenly dawned upon me – Brahms’s life had been unofficially ruled by the thought of ‘so near yet so far’, especially with his love for Clara Schumann. And by feeling so intensely about ‘so near yet so far’, I was actually getting a glimpse of his thoughts and a glimpse of the summary of his life!!!!!

That is, by not able to gain entry to his museum, I was actually a step closer to his world!

With that thought, I was thrilled, close to tears and was most thankful. :')

To travel from Hamburg to Vienna all by myself was a romantic dream comes true. I was extraordinarily pleased that I did it at that point of my life. It was something I had wanted to accomplish, and it was a dream fulfilled. It might not make sense to many people that Johannes Brahms was the only reason why I travelled that far, but I didn't think it matters.

What matter was I had always wanted to see what he had seen; had always wanted to walk where he had walked; wanted to coffee where he had coffeed and continue to love what he had loved...

I had also longed to get closer to him - his world, his thoughts, his emotions... And the ironic part was, all these were fulfilled only by not able to gain entry to his museum!

So, even though I wasn’t physically closer to his museum, I was emotionally closer to his thoughts and life. I'm contented enough.

I couldn't describe how thankful I was. And I still am :')

Footnote:
On my second visit, I finally get to go into the museum. That was 11 years later :')
~ Brahms Museum 2011