My hidden date - Clara Schumann Hall

Despite my excitement, certain bit of insecurity still managed to creep in when I arrived at (the magical) Frankfurt airport! It was such mixed feeling. And I couldn't quite explain why I felt that way. I started to be unsure about my 'hidden date' with Clara Schumann.

Is it really happening? Am I really leaving the airport, taking a taxi and hoping to get to a Date which had given me no prior physical confirmation or whatsoever? Are all these thoughts purely what I had imagined? Or are they gonna happened for real? What if I arrive and see no Clara Schumann? And hall? :'(

Before long, I realized I was literally trying to delay myself and procrastinate my leave from the airport - I went to the washroom three times in a row,  insisted on using the airport wifi when I have my own phone data, loitered aimlessly in Facebook, repeatedly checked my email mailbox... it did take me quite a while to muster up enough courage before I decided to join the queue and hopped into a taxi which brought me right to my destination in less than 15 minutes. I was still in a daze.

Ah... after much delay and wait and anticipation, I arrived at my date... :)

Clara Schumann Hall!!!

Woooo~ so this was the woman Brahms had loved his whole entire life... I stood in front of her sculpture so as to have a closer look at her... and I had stood and stared at her for a pretty long long long long while... I just wished to admire what Brahms had loved... and I will continue loving her... oh yes, of course, I had asked what was 'the message' that she had wanted to tell me, having summoned me all the way from Singapore to Frankfurt... and yes of course, she was quiet, as what I had expected - such stillness in the air reminded me of Brahms' silence when I tucked a bunch of yellow flowers in his arm, at his grave in Vienna several years ago :') 

[Happenings/ messages/ words more than often need time to settle themselves down, then be transported via various routes and channel... I still firmly believe all happenings have their moment of happening… I shall wait :)]

To my astonishment and pleasant surprise, I was left alone, for quite some time, to explore the hall all by myself, because the receptionist of the hall was busy tending to other matters... I browsed through the entire hall, front and back stage, and I enjoyed some private time with my diary while seated at one of the audience seats!

And did I mention I had quietly, secretly and unofficially reserved my favourite seat at Clara Schumann Hall :)) That was a huge pleasure, at least for that moment and for my many looking-back moments :))

A correspondence between Brahms and Clara that warmed my heart so much... the situation was simple - he wanted to give her a sum of money... he wrote with such gentleness and light-heartedness, full of affection, appreciation and respect; she rejected his offer, sent her words across in a tone with gratitude and pride, yet at the same time, full of affection, appreciation and respect :')

以下的两封来回书信让我异常动容 :')
他想给她一笔钱。说得如此轻描淡写、轻如鸿毛、深情体贴却又不失尊重。
她说不。说得如此温柔委婉、毅然决然、有尊严有技巧却又尽显感动。:')

A Hidden Message

This was something that had excited and thrilled me since a couple of days ago… 

Part 1:

2 months ago, I had already made up my mind to buy Lufthansa Sale air tickets to London, which was only $1389. I knew this is a very good price (not their best price though) as compared to their normal Singapore to London airfare, yet for some reasons, a part of me didn’t want to just commit straightaway and was constantly searching, trying to look out for a better deal. As a result, I procrastinated my ticket buying.

When I had finally decided to commit to buy, the lowest price had shifted to $1403, in which I think it wasn’t too bad since the raise wasn’t that much. However, I soon realized that $1403 wasn’t the flight timing that I had originally planned and wanted! The price for my desired flight was already costing $1680!!! :(

Yes, though it is still cheaper than the normal Lufthansa airfare, I was still very reluctant to pay for this increased difference. In the end, I went ahead to book the $1403 fare, which means I would have a layover of 8 hours in Frankfurt airport, an option I would never have chosen under normal circumstances. But I quickly turn to my usual positive thoughts that – Oh well, I could just take it as a private me-time to read or do some work at the airport; I could even pop out of the airport for a little breather plus a little coffee treat in the nearby Frankfurt city centre :)

Part 2:

That particular morning of happening, I had some out-of-the-blue thoughts unexpectedly, and I was somehow trying to find a link between Brahms and Frankfurt. Yes, the next sensible thing to do was naturally to confirm these thoughts and info over web & books. And to my astonishment, I realized Clara Schumann (The woman Brahms had loved and corresponded all his life but both were never together) had actually passed away in Frankfurt! And that she had even held her funeral in Frankfurt (as well as in Bonn) That was when I felt the first trace of excitement and I couldn’t help wondering if there really was a hidden message for me in Frankfurt!!! :’)

Soon, I realized I was trying to put together the facts, the thoughts, and all those wild guesses and ideas into one big piece of picture and I was delightfully surprised to discover that - they fitted, nicely, and made sense!

I’m in awe at how things had their own timing of happening… and how timing could brew and maneuver all happenings to happen at the right moment they belong to…

What had started as a procrastinated booking-error was secretly brewing and transforming itself into a charming date that went beyond what I could have imagined. And had I been less sensitive, I would have completely missed it!

Up to this point, Frankfurt is no longer a name for a casual morning coffee or for a simple connecting flight. It is the entrance to a romantic longing that had always been dwelling inside my heart.

So, if my intuition about the hidden date is correct, then I ought to be a given a meeting place, right? I began searching madly on the web… and soon, I found this music conservatory where Clara had once taught when she was in Frankfurt. I was delighted. With a hopeful heart, I further browsed within the conservatory and discovered they REALLY do have a medium-sized concert hall by the name of ‘Clara Schumann Hall’!!! I was so overwhelmed with excitement and my heart was pounding so fast. I went blank for quite many seconds. I couldn't quite make out, what do do next… but yes, eventually, I did manage to string up some major bits and pieces of the information together.

My final search was the distance. And when the screen of my Mac book promptly announced the distance between the music conservatory and the airport to be (FIFTEEN) 15 minutes by car, I was thrilled beyond words!

My layover in Frankfurt airport would be 8 hours. I have to buffer some time for the airport procedures plus all types of wait. After which, I should have a comfortable stretch of 4 hours for a back-and-forth trip between the airport and the music conservatory via a taxi. And I suppose I could include in that 4 hours, a sip to a nice hot cuppa while doing some reminiscing and reading on my favourite book of Brahms & Clara.

I am now pretty much convinced this is the right place to meet Clara, or rather, could it be that Brahms had also thought the timing is right and had wanted me to meet (and feel) Clara? :’) 

I might be expecting a next episode, or perhaps never at all. And even if I do, it could be next month, a year or ten years later. In whichever case, I would be a calm and patient audience as I watch the flow of fate unfolds before me. I promise to be actively yet passively moving along with it… and I promise to wait :’)                        

[Feeling extremely thankful]  

Footnote: Yes, I did manage to visit Clara… My hidden date - Clara Schumann Hall